


Never Go Drinking With Poe Dameron

by BuffShipper



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Anal Sex, Bisexual Poe Dameron, Bisexuality, Blow Jobs, Come Shot, Comedy, Drunk Sex, Everyone Loves Poe Dameron, F/M, Gay Sex, Hand Jobs, Het and Slash, M/M, Multi, Mutual Masturbation, OT3, Open Relationships, Polyamory, Rimming, Sex Toys, Sexual Experimentation, Shower Sex, Threesome - F/M/M, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-10-31 03:15:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17841377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BuffShipper/pseuds/BuffShipper
Summary: A humor trashfic where just about everyone in the Resistance has slept with Poe Dameron, especially when alcohol is involved.





	1. StormFlower

The mission had been a success.

The unit, led by Commander Poe Dameron, hotshot ace pilot of The Resistance, had surprised a First Order munitions outpost, allowing for a weapons raid conducted by First Order turncoat FN-2187-affectionately dubbed "Finn", and valuable intelligence to be collected. They destroyed the base and hightailed it out of there. A good day for the Resistance.

The attack was hardly major, but it should be enough to give Supreme Leader Kylo Ren and his generals a migraine, and to Finn, that was enough.

Touching down on the secure Resistance base, the raiding party was greeted with a shower of cheers and adulation.

Damage done, minimal casualties, there was nothing more Finn could ask for.

'Well, there was one thing', thought Finn.

"Rose!" He called to the crowd, climbing out of his X-wing. "Rose!"

The mission had taken a better part of a week, and right now Finn wanted nothing more to wrap his broad arms around his Rose, to draw her close and shower her with kisses. That...and actually take a shower, now that he thought of it.

"Finn!"

The diminutive form of Rose Tico made her way through the crowd, having to jump and wave her arms to be seen, though her stained yellow jumpsuit and exotic features made her her unmistakable to Finn.

"Rose!" Finn yelled, weaving through the crowd to kiss her.

"You stink!" Rose wrinkled her nose at him, shoving him at arms length.

"No showers out in the battlefield, babe. I was hoping we can ditch this scene and clean up," laughed Finn. "Besides, you don't quite smell fresh yourself, you know!"

Acting affronted, Rose gave him a good-natured punch in the arm. A maintenance worker for the Resistance coming off her shift, she knew she must of offended. Trust Finn to point that out. He still doesn't know how to talk to girls yet, a quality Rose found endearing, luckily.

"Really? You're lucky I miss you, dummy," agreed Rose. "Let's get you cleaned up."

***

"Oh my, do you smell!" Rose teased as they entered a closed shower chamber together in one of the base's freshers.

Turning on the steaming jets, Finn groaned in appreciation as the hot water hit his body.

Soaping up a washcloth from the linens, Rose turned him around to face her.

She scrubbed his face first, working her way down to his dark, broad chest, shoulders, and armpits.

"I wish I could've gotten your ass and balls first, but everything was so dirty. I may have to use two washcloths just on you," Rose teased, working her way down to his genitals.

Finn could feel himself getting aroused as she massaged his balls and soaped the length of his shaft, but before he could make a move, she spun him around and finished her task, prompting a groan of frustration from Finn.

"Tease," muttered Finn, hands against the wall, head shaking.

"Soap me up," laughed Rose, handing Finn a fresh washcloth, tossing Finn's in the used linens.

Rose giggled as Finn lathered her up, laughing at the way he obviously spent too much time on her breasts and ass.

"Something tells me you're getting wet...and it's not from the shower," grinned Finn, purposely slipping a finger inside her as he washed her.

"Tease," Rose shot back as he spun her around.

"Did someone miss me?" Rose breathed as she felt Finn's cock press against her wet buttcheeks as he washed her back.

One hand reaching for her dripping heat and the other for her breasts, Finn whispered "I've spent an entire week with a unit of mostly men...you can imagine how much I missed you..."

Biting her lip, she turned around to face Finn and took his erection in her hands. "I don't have to imagine. I can feel just much you miss me right here..."

"No..." Finn pushed her against the wall, between the spraying jets. "I'll show you how much I missed you..."

Rose kissed him hard, and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, using him to support her as he lifted her leg up, cock at the ready.

"I think you missed me a whole lot," she gasped into his mouth as he plunged deep inside her.  

"Maybe just a little.." Finn replied, his hips providing a steady rhythm.

"Ooh..Nothing is _little_  about you, Finn," moaned Rose, holding him tighter lest she slip from the heat of the shower and the sweat of their lovemaking.

"Miss me?" Asked Finn, his pace quickening, his kisses deeper.

"Yes..." Rose replied between kisses.

"Miss my dick?" Finn huffed, his thrusts escalating in intensity.

"You're so...ah..ahdorable...when youuuuu..try to..talk dirtyeeeee!" Squealed Rose, the force of Finn's thrusts bringing her to orgasm.

Finn was not long in following her to completion, his come spilling over inside her.

Slowly setting her leg down, Finn slid himself out of her and gave her a tender kiss, letting the shower run on them for several moments as they basked in the afterglow of their sex.

"Perhaps we should go back out there before they realize that we're missing," suggested Finn, kissing Rose's forehead.

"Yeah," nodded Rose, the statement breaking her out her reverie.

"That good huh?" Grinned Finn.

"Finn!" Laughed Rose. "You have no idea how to talk to women!"

She kissed him and slapped his ass as she reached for a drying towel. "You're so lucky you're hung, you hopeless, hopeless man."

***

"So...How did you manage a week without me?" swaggered Finn as they left the fresher in their clean uniforms.

 "Lil' Finn." Rose winked, walking away, stopping Finn dead in his tracks, puzzled.

"Who's Lil' Finn? Hey, wait up!"

   

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned for more!  
> StormPilot up next!


	2. StormPilot

In celebration of the successful raid from the previous few days, General Organa approved of a base-wide celebration, all invited. 

"Hey, man. You want to come to the afterparty tonight?" asked Poe the morning of the party in the mess hall.

Rose had noshed early and left to get a jump on her maintenance duties so she could come to the party on time, leaving Finn to eat breakfast with Poe. Not that Finn complained.

"Afterparty?" Finn questioned.

"You know? The party after the party? Catch a few cocktails? Regale the hanger's-on with your heroic tales? Get shitfaced?" clarified Poe.

"Well, yeah. I mean, if Rose is OK with it," replied Finn.

"Yeah, man, Sure. Sure. I'll be at the bar all night," nodded Poe.

"You usually are," teased Finn, clapping his friend on the shoulder.

"Hey, it's not a drinking problem if you don't have a problem with drinking," laughed Poe, clapping Finn back. "Besides: I'll be playing barkeep most of the night. So let me hook you up, alright?"

"Sure thing, bro."

***

The party proved to be a rousing success. General Leia held court, recounting old war stories: her escape from the Death Star, the Battle of Endor. As she became more imbibed, she told them of the time she choked out the notorious Tatooine gangster Jabba the Hutt in nothing but a steel bikini.

As the night went on, the crowd started to thin. The General retired early. Rose kissed Finn goodnight: she had to wake early the next morning to get a jump on her duties, and wanted to do so without a hangover. She told him to enjoy himself, but not to stay out too late.

Soon it was just the boys, and the handful of lady grunts and aliens who consisted of the Resistance's fighting force- the "afterparty" Poe spoke of. And what a party it was. Raunchy music played, drunken fights ensued, curses of all sorts in many languages filled the alcohol-scented air.

Poe held court this time, recounting their recent mission, embellishing points for the members who weren't part of the particular unit in which the party was held in honor of.

Poe was particularly partial to Finn, singing the praises of his right hand man.

"Hey man," said Finn as the bar seats emptied. "I appreciate everything you said. Even the made-up stuff."

Poe took the last drought of his beer. "Yeah, bro. I meant everything I said. You are such a _huge_ part of this! I can't even begin to tell you how much you mean to me...the Resistance."

"To you?"

"Nah...I mean...you saved my life more times than I can count. I--" choked Poe. "I...I love you, man."

"Wait. What?" Finn set the mug he was about to sip from down. 

Poe reached across the table, grasping Finn's hand, his eyes locked on Finn's. "I said I fucking love you, man."

"What?"

***

The friends stumbled their way into Poe's quarters, pushing, pulling, their embrace ever shifting, their mouths locked in a passionate kiss.

As Poe backed him to his bed,  Finn vaguely thought of Rose and what she would think of this, but he was too drunk and too turned on by what had become of the night's festivities to want to stop.

Tripping, Finn broke his fall by catching himself over Poe's bed, the room spinning.

Poe positioned himself behind Finn as Finn steadied himself over the bed, Poe's arm wrapped around his middle.

Steadying himself with one hand on the mattress, Poe reached into Finn's pants, taking out his cock.

"Not the ass, bro," slurred Finn as he felt Poe's hardness press up against him through his pants. "I'm serious. I shit out there, man."

"Hey, man. No problem." Poe whispered into his ear, stroking Finn's cock. He could smell the alcohol lingering on his breath. "No problem. Just relax. Let me take care of you."

A part of Finn to take a swing at him and run from this, but the firmness of Poe's grip on him and the tenderness of his friend's kisses to his neck and ears stayed his hand. That and he was too drunk to even think about moving.

"Just relax..." whispered Poe, his stroking bringing Finn closer and closer to completion. "Relax...yes..."

"Oh shit, bro! Shit! Shit!" moaned Finn as he came, Poe squeezing the load out him like toothpaste out of a tube.

"You did good, buddy," whispered Poe softly as Finn bucked under him.

And with that, his cock spent, Finn passed out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned! What will Rose think of all this?


	3. Never Go Drinking With Poe Dameron!

"Rose?"

Finn woke up, head still a bit foggy from the night before. No Rose. Slowly, he peiced together what he could remember.

He immediately checked his pants. Still on. Matter of fact, he was completely _on_ the bed, his boots sitting neatly in the corner. 

"Hey buddy, you're up!" A cheerful Poe announced, carrying a couple cups of caff.

Finn, accepted the caff, but eyed it suspiciously, overcome with mixed emotions as his memory returned. "Didn't put anything in this?"

"Nothing but cream and sugar, if that's what you're asking," replied Poe, taking a swig of his caff, his brow knitting.

"And you didn't put anything in my drinks last night?" Finn asked, still side-eying a bemused Poe.

"You drank the same exact thing I did. You just can't handle your liquor."

"So. What," Finn gestured. "You're gay? Bisexual?"

"I prefer the term 'equal opportunity lover'myself I learned a long time ago not to be choosy when you don't know when your next lay is gonna be. But last night wasn't-" Poe replied.

"So a hole's a hole to you, huh? Is that what you were thinking about last night when you got me drunk? Huh?!" Finn accused.

"I didn't fuck you in the ass if that's what you're asking.  Look, last night wasn't like that! Everything we did last night, you can remember. Barely, probably, but you can remember it. You passed out. I hauled your big ass onto the bed, and I slept in that chair," Poe gestured towards the chair in the corner. "That's it. Okay? Besides...I meant everything I said last night. You mean a lot to me. I wouldn't take advantage of you."

Finn stared at him, his jaw tight.

"Alright. Nah, man. Alright. I trust you." Finn sighed. "I just don't know about Rose, though. I just hope she understands, you know. I had a bit too much to drink, and--"

"I think she'll understand. We're all tight-knit here." Poe said, sitting beside Finn, putting his arm around his shoulders.

"I hope," swallowed Finn.

"Oh, C'mon, buddy! Let's get some chow first. No use getting your ass kicked on an empty stomach, now, huh?" Laughed Poe, pulling Finn off the bed.

"Your ass kicked," replied Finn, shaking his head.

***

Finn and Poe made their way from the barracks to the mess hall, amongst the other members of the Resistance.

"So have you fucked just about everyone here?" Asked Finn.

"Well...not everybody." Poe nearly spit out a mouthful of caff. "'Sup, Sarge." 

"Commander," Nodded the male seargant with a slight grin.

"Aight...dish, bro."

"I...really try not to..."

More nods. Grins. Greetings. Male. Female. Alien. 

"Look, I heard you have a reputation...I never could believe it, but after last night..." pressed Finn

General Organa walked briskly past them. "Lieutenant Finn. Commander Dameron," she added with a smile and a wink.

Poe nodded and returned the smile. "General Leia."

He winked at Finn.

"General _Leia_?" Finn demanded, eyes bulging out of his head.

"Why do you think Kylo Ren nearly killed me?" Poe grinned.

"Nah. No way." Finn shook his head.

"Long time ago, bud. Ancient history. Involved alcohol. Funny, though. I usually try to avoid Force Sensitives..." Poe trailed off.

"Force Sensitives? Like--"

"Your girl-pal? The Jedi chick?" Poe pulled his cheek back to reveal lost teeth. He shook his head. "Thought, uh, too loudly about _her_ and doing... _things_ ...and she...you know."

Poe punched the palm of his hand for effect.

Finn laughed. "She can be like that sometimes. Hey, aren't you with Connix? How is she OK with...you  know..?" 

"We got a pretty open relationship," replied Poe with a grin.

"POE DAMERON! YOU SON OF A BITCH!" shrieked a voice.

"Uh oh," muttered Poe.

"Oh shit," flinched Finn, his stomach turning in knots. 

Activity stopped for a second, but resumed quickly when it was discovered who was doing the yelling and who was getting yelled at.

Rose Tico stormed towards the pair, wrench in hand like a club.

Finn stepped in front of Poe. "Look, baby, I can explain. I--"

Rose put finger to Finn's face. "You. Shut the hell up."

She turned to Poe. " _You_. You got him drunk, didn't _you?"_

Rose jabbed at his chest with a finger. "You know he can't handle his booze. So whadya do?"

She punched Poe in the arm, annunciating each word with a fist. "You got him DRUNK!"

"What is...?" Finn was confused.

"Finn, sweet Finn. You. Never. Go. Drinking. With. Poe. Dameron." Rose explained, turning the color of her namesake.

Finn stared at the two, gesturing towards them. "You mean? You two?"

Rose blushed. "Once. Alcohol, as it usually is with this man, was involved."

Poe shrugged.

Finn glared at him. Both of them. "And you never told me?"

"It was a long time ago. I knew about Poe's  reputation. Didn't want to die without seeing what it was all about. He was nice about it."

"So you know that him and I....Hey...well I guess we're even?" Finn asked, hopeful.

"We'll talk," Rose said through her teeth.

Poe clapped them both on the back. "Yeah! Even Stevens!"

"You're too fucking smooth for your own good, Dameron." Rose glared at Poe.

"Hey, you had a good time, then. I guess you...?" Poe gestured towards Finn.. "Had a good time... no harm no foul, right?"

Finn and Rose couldn't help but blush. He _was_ right, though they hated to admit it.

"Too fucking smooth." Rose repeated, a slight grin breaching her face.

"Tonight?" Poe beamed.

Rose took a deep breath. "Eh, why not?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned for the next chapter! Bi-sex ahead ;)


	4. StormFlowerPilot

The three found themselves in Finn and Rose's quarters later that night, passing around a bottle of liquor, sitting on chairs they had nicked from the mess.

"Just why is it you never go drinking with Poe Dameron?" laughed Finn, passing the bottle to Rose.

"The answer to that is exactly the reason why we're sitting here right now!" snorted Rose, taking her turn and shoving the bottle to Poe, who took it with a grin.

"Hey! Alcohol just...loosens things up. Nature...just takes care of itself after that," Poe said, taking a swig.

"Nature?" Finn questioned, eyebrow cocked.

"Animal magnetism, pal. Nothing with a pulse can resist my charm," shrugged Poe with a sly smile.

"Well, nothing except for *ahem* Jedi girls and-" cracked Finn.

"Hey, hey, hey, that's low, man. They got, like, the Force to shield them from my charms or something," Poe interrupted, punching Finn in the shoulder.

"That's not how the Force works, my friend," snickered Finn, punching Poe back.

Rose smiled and shook her head at the banter between the two.

'These guys are just too adorable,' she thought, accepting another turn at the bottle, the liquid inside washing away her inhibitions with every swallow.

"So. Finn. Just what did Poe do last night?" asked Rose, a michevious glint in her eye.

"Oh, why?" asked Finn, though he could already guess why she asked.

"I want to see," replied Rose, shifting in her chair, biting her lip, eyes lidded.

Poe rubbed the inside of Finn's leg. "C'mon, man. What did I do?"

Finn glanced at Rose. She was feeling herself up in anticipation for the show she had expected to see.

Poe turned Finn to look at him, kissing him full on the lips. Reaching into Finn's pants, Poe took out Finn's cock and started stroking it. Rose whistled in appreciation.

Emboldened by Rose's reaction, Finn took out Poe's cock, reciprocating the motions that Poe was performing on him, his enthusiasm building with every oscillating stroke.

"Hmmm...that's what I'm talking about!" Rose catcalled, putting the bottle of liquor down and sliding off her chair to her hands and knees.

Crawling on her all fours, Rose closed the space between them, and took Finn's cock from Poe's grasp, taking it full in her mouth. Finn groaned into Poe's kiss as his dick slid out of Rose's mouth, her teeth playfully grazing his swollen head.

Rose then took Poe in her mouth as she stroked her beau, all the while the men kissed, Rose switching between the two in intervals.

Finn stood up when she resumed sucking off kPoe, kicking his pants off and throwing off his shirt as he went. Kneeling behind Rose, he began stripping Rose of her clothes. Poe took the loll in the activities to strip off his own clothing, adding to the growing pile in the corner.

The trio fully nude, Finn positioned himself behind Rose, stroking himself as he lapped her sopping cunt, his tongue making its way in and out of her as she rocked back and forth, her own mouth pleasuring Poe.

When Finn got his fill of her taste, he rubbed the head of his cock against her heat, and suggested they continue on the bed. Poe and Rose agreed, and Finn shared Rose's taste with Poe as Rose stroked them both.

Laying himself on the bed, Finn positioned himself on his side, stroking himself in eagerness as he waited for Rose and Poe to join him.

Rose laid her head in the crook of Finn's arm as he spooned her, his other arm wrapped around her middle. She moaned as Finn slowly began thrusting. Squeezing a generous amount of lube on himself, Poe then positioned himself behind Finn, teasing Finn's asshole with his slick cock.

Wrapping his arm around Finn's middle, Poe whispered "Just relax it...I'll go in easy..."

Finn kissed Rose harder as he felt the head of Poe's cock insert into his ass.

"You're doing great, buddy...ooh you're so tight...yeah!" Poe cooed, his cock slowly slipping through the confines of Finn's anus.

Once Finn's ass accommodated him, Poe matched the thrusts Finn was giving to Rose, the three connected together like boxcars on a train.

Unbelievable were the sensations Finn experienced, his asshole gripping Poe's cock as Rose's pussy gripped his. He was filling and _being filled_ simultaneously _._

Holding Finn tighter, Poe whispered, "You're so fucking tight, buddy...I'm so close..."

Poe came in his ass, and Finn soon followed, Poe's cock hit his g-spot, causing Finn to cum so violently into Rose he could swear that Poe's own load was passing through him and into her, Rose shaking as she accepted the torrent.

Finn's spent cock slipped from inside Rose, sighing as he felt his own cum leaking from her onto his leg, and Poe's cum leaking from out of _him_ , onto Poe's shifting leg.

Accepting kisses from his lovers, Finn fell into an exhausted, contented sleep, the other two not far behind him, the last thought in his mind the question of why they never did this before, and when were they going to do it again.


	5. Lil' Finn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finn requests a visit with "Lil' Finn"

"You want me do to what with what now?" Rose asked, doubled over with laughter.

"Well...I was hoping you'd...you know.." Finn trailed off, his ears getting hot with embarrassment.

"So let me get this straight: you take it up the ass once and now you want me to take _my_ toy and stick it up _your_ ass?"

"Yup...that's the jist," replied Finn, staring pointedly at the ground.

"Anything else Poe show you that you want to share?" demanded Rose.

"Rose..."

"Fine! But if you come back with anything else like this again, I swear: no more drinking with Poe! Understand?"

"I love you..." Finn smiled.

"Yeah, I know."

***

" _That's_ Lil' Finn?" asked Finn, horrified at the sight of the foot-long, double-sided monstrosity that Rose was presenting him with.

"Yup."

"Rose...that thing ain't 'Lil'!" Finn squeaked.

"Neither are you," Rose grinned.

"Why does it have two sides?"

"Look, dummy. You made me take it out. So you are either gonna let me use it or I will beat you over the head with it. You decide."

"When do we start?" 

***

"I can't believe you let me talk you into this," said Finn, naked, staring at the ceiling, legs spread-eagle.

Brandishing Lil' Finn, Rose lubricated the shaft of the toy, sitting on the bed beside Finn.

"Having second thoughts?" Rose giggled, teasing Finn's asshole with the head of the toy.

"Thing's... bigger," muttered Finn, eyeballing Lil' Finn with a combination of trepidation and anticipation.

Pressing the fake cock harder against his hole, Rose snorted as the real one sprang to attention almost instantly.

"Are you really getting this hard so quickly?" asked Rose incredulously as Finn's ass swallowed the head of the toy.

Finn only answered with a moan as the toy slid deeper inside of him, the sigh of his escasty making Rose wet despite her slight misgivings.

Slowly oscillating the toy inside Finn, Rose reached underneath herself and began to massage her sopping wet pussy.

"Hmmm...I think I have an idea," purred Rose.

Positioning herself across from Finn, their legs scissoring, Rose guided the other head of Lil' Finn inside of her, the toy creating a bridge between Finn's asshole and her cunt.

Finn began pumping his cock as Rose pumped the toy between them, the pair moaning in pleasure over the sheer carnality of the act.

Rubbing her clit with her free hand, it wasn't long before Rose's orgasm came, pushing Finn over the edge, his throbbing cock erupting like a volcano, his hot cum splattering all over Rose's heaving torso.

Finn's head fell back, and he let out a contented sigh, his asshole and cock spent.

Catching her breath, Rose happily declared, "Scratch that. You need to go drinking with Poe Dameron a lot more often!"


End file.
